I haven’t left the house much and have spent entirely too much time scrolling social media, for all I know cats are trolling the city streets right now. Ha, just kidding. I see all you assholes posting about your traveling and vacations and going to fucking bars in the middle of a pandemic. I’m not here to mince words either: Fuck you and the anti-masker that raised you. Meanwhile, I have visions of vaccinations running through my head, knowing that it will be unlikely I’ll see anywhere outside of Central Iowa until late 2021. (Thanks, Kim!)
Despite the Dumpster Fire that was 2020, I had some moments where the flames were temporarily doused. For one, I was lucky enough to get in a vacation before the news of the pandemic reaching the United States hit. Oh wait, I was actually ON A CRUISE when the headline published that the virus had come. A fucking cruise. Thinking about it now blows my mind. However, it was an amazing trip and we consider ourselves lucky as to the timing of it. While it sucks to have to use the bulk of your PTO so early on in the year, this was perhaps the biggest lesson ever in “use it or lose it” (ya know, if I actually had a job where I was earning PTO, lolz). Before everything shut down, I was also able to travel for roller derby a few times – including going to Lincoln for a training camp with some of my derby idols. I played in a few bouts with my new team and realized (again!) how much I love this sport. Alas, beyond March, derby has been shut down and I only went on a handful of trail skates over summer. I want to go back to practices so bad. 😭
This leads me to another highlight of the year – finally finishing my master’s degree. Which included finishing my thesis research (which, unfortunately, had to be shut down early due to the pandemic). THREE YEARS OF WORK that I was finally able to see to its end. I completed the bulk of my degree requirements (i.e., coursework) over a year ago, but had more difficulty in finding internship sites (even more so during COVID/sport shutdowns). The bright side here was that I could finally do my contact hours virtually and individually which was always my preference and not allowed and ONLY THEN did I crush that requirement. 2020 helped me figure out what I want to do with the rest of my life (at least for the foreseeable future while I figure out if working for myself is actually sustainable). But I learned what I like and don’t like and what and how I do things that are authentically me and not because someone else does them. Those are important lessons even when you’re 43-years-old.
I also trained for another ultra. Yes, my race was canceled. I ran it anyway. Inspired by a friend who finished a VIRTUAL HUNDRED MILER, I felt like training for a 30-miler would not be a waste of time and the best excuse to get me outside several times per week. (It worked!) The other thing that got me outside a lot? Golf. I played a record number of rounds this year. I was also able to participate in the entirety of the women’s 9-hole season. Some weeks, this was the only time I saw another human being outside of my husband. Surprisingly, I didn’t bike as much as I have in past years, I think because of how much I associate it with the social aspect.
But I did read more than prior years! (Look for a post on that later.) Even with a pandemic lull that occurred when I only wanted to stare at games on my phone for hours on end, I still finished 54 books in 2020. My initial goal was for 52 books – a goal that I reached in 2015. Having access to the library for window pick-ups and digital loans was such a benefit to have during the shutdowns. For what it’s worth, in 2021 I’m aiming for 60 books. Because all I see is more free time ahead of me. More free time, more plants, amirite?! I acquired a silly amount of houseplants this year and almost didn’t kill all of them.
So, what’s the lesson in 2020? Stupidly – and I am so, so sorry, Universe! – I set an intention early on in the year to “Be more bored.” BOY OH BOY was I ever bored. And I did not like it one bit. Particularly when I realized that the bulk of my life – work, play, volunteer, school – was centered around sport, and I had literally NOTHING to do. My husband even remarked on the realization of how much I was doing stuff outside the house. Well… I guess I learned that I need some more variety and some more boredom in my life. I learned the importance and value of the outdoors. I learned the importance of being authentic. I learned that I can sustain the life of a plant and that MAYBE I DO HAVE A GREEN THUMB AFTER ALL. I learned that JOMO is the inverse of FOMO. I also learned that I really like my hair shorter, while I wait on bated/masked breath for when I can feel it’s not a high risk to go to the hair salon (it’s been 15 months since I’ve had a haircut and I AM OVER IT and yet I refuse to give myself an at-home fix).
*waves wildly at all the things* Look, this all sucks. I hate being home all the time. I AM WITH YOU on all that. But wear your fucking masks and stay home.