30s Life List

My first SXSW

- Mel

Going to SXSW was on my 30s Life List (aka Bucket List), which I had basically thrown out the window because, um… I’m now in my 40s. BUT I finally had an opportunity to spend four days in Austin, Texas for the infamous SXSW conference.

SXSW 2019

Being that it’s my first time visiting for the conference (my second time in Austin), I don’t really have a lot of “advice” for doing your first SXSW. I can tell you some of the things I enjoyed and would likely do more of in the future. Because, yes, I am DEFINITELY going back! We had an unfortunate series of flight delays and reroutes that had us landing in Austin around midnight – causing us to miss the entirety of the first day we planned to get there, settle in, get our access badges before the conference started, and meet up with friends. It ended up feeling like a long weekend, which felt like both long enough and not enough time at all.

SXSW Austin conference

I should probably state this before getting super into my experience that I am the type of human who LOVES conferences. If I ever have the opportunity to travel for one, even better. Love of Learning is my top character strength, and SXSW sincerely brings value if you want to learn about something new. Technology is my jam. I don’t work in the industry – but there are events and sessions at SXSW geared toward both the industry professional to the novice nerd who is obsessed with the intersection of wearable tech and sports industries (hello, I’m a sport psych student!). There is so much to interact with!

SXSW LG interactive sign language wall

And this is the kind of conference where you could make it what you wanted. SXSW is both a conference and a series of festivals. If I return, I would like to take part in either the film or music festivals. Unfortunately, since I was there during the first weekend, the music festival wasn’t to start until the following week.

SXSW houses rainey street austin

Being there on Day 1 of the conference allowed us to explore some of the SXSW Houses on Rainey Street – before many of them closed for private parties and before the bulk of the crowds came in for the weekend (I could never figure out how to get Twitter House access, whomp). I was initially freaking out a little bit about the possibility of crowds. Look, I like to socialize but I get overwhelmed pretty quickly at events with a lot of people. I was nervous about waiting in lines (yes, it will happen – but for the most part, they move quick!) and being crammed into spaces with people only looking to gain entry for free booze (have money, will travel to the next place without a line where I can purchase my own, thankyouverymuch). Whatever your method of self-care is – meditation (we did that at the lululemon sweat house!), naps, eating a bunch of street tacos… make space to recharge.

SWSW lululemon sweat house

We also had an access badge that provided a quiet retreat (and guaranteed entry) from the crowds. Admittedly, our group was having a BLAST and we hit the day-long party opportunities often. And honestly? That is something I would definitely do differently when I go back.

SXSW austin happy hour

For the most part, we started our days at a big session – the first day was Jonah Peretti of Buzzfeed (his session was #presentationgoals), the second day was a session with Malcolm Gladwell about autonomous cars. For the follow-up sessions of our day, our group split up.

SXSW jonah peretti session gifs

I was really interested in the women in sports sessions – I found one that had the executive director of roller derby on it! And another with women athletes talking about their experiences as being part of The Body Issue of Sports Illustrated (the editor was also on the panel!). I was super bummed that I didn’t know about the earlier WWE sessions of the day until I arrived at the conference space (WWE also had some really interesting topics surrounding women in sports entertainment). Hey, at least I got to GIF myself with the championship belt!

Collectively, we seemed to tap out at 3 sessions and then sought entertainment (and food… and some of us, naps). Despite not being there for the music portion of the festival, we saw awesome live music every night! (I mean, it IS Austin.)

SXSW drink vouchers

So, yes, on to my “advice”…
WEAR COMFORTABLE SHOES. I cannot emphasize that enough. If you’re not walking, you’re taking super awesome (and convenient!) scooters all over the place. I was partial to Lime. I would also recommend a backpack if a) you enjoy taking scooters everywhere and b) you’re the kind of person who doesn’t want to return to the hotel room in between every session and c) you are also the person who seems to pick up swag everywhere you go, and d) duh, hands-free to play with all the interactive stuff! Also, bring a refillable water bottle, please?

SXSW Lime scooters austin

Our trip allowed us both to experience the conference and explore a bit of the Austin hangs. Late nights and early mornings… man, it takes a special person to do that for a 10-day conference. Have you ever been to SXSW? What advice would you give to someone attending for their first time?

SXSW LG interactive

Birthday Flashback: Ages 30-39

- Mel 1 Comment

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!

MAN. This post was harder than I thought to write! And not because of any weird emotions or awful memories, but because my brain legit sucks. I cannot remember my own birthdays. That’s some bullshit. And this is exactly why I asked for a 5-year diary for Christmas, which I have YET to use!

So it took some detective work (like, glossing over social media accounts and waybacking old blog posts and texting my sister).

And finding hilarious pictures like this:

Birthday-sunglasses_34 throwback

I guess it’s better than passing out in a handicapped bathroom stall on your 29th birthday, eh?

But here’s the lot of what I got from ages 30-39:

30 I remember being SO excited about turning 30 and getting the hell out of my 20s (#bye). I honestly had to message my sister to help me remember how we celebrated because it was completely lost in my memory (I even second-guessed her because that’s how terrible my memory of the event is. Isn’t that awful?!) I can’t even find any pictures from my bash. I do, however, have a 30th birthday CD that was made for me.

Very limited story, because forgetfulness, but we went to Velvet Tango Room and had a HUGE party (apparently the guy I was dating at the time helped me plan the thing — though neither my sister or I even remember who that was). All of my friends were there though. And two of my sisters came in for it. And I remember having either dinner or brunch (widely different memories, no?) with my mom and got a new luggage set — which I still have and LOVE because Nine West is amazing. And maybe the color purple is strongly tied to memory?

31 I had a Cinco de Mel get-together with friends at our favorite Mexican restaurant. I was probably heavily intoxicated on Cadillac margaritas and Malley’s chocolates. I’m hoping that Facebook memories or Timehop will help me recover some of those lost events from a weekend or some-such — or maybe I just kept it really low key that year? I have a picture of me in the salon in Ohio with a fresh cut, so I must have spent the afternoon with my sister (which probably, definitely included some shopping at Gabriel Brothers).

32 The birthday that I went to Vegas… but basically spent it alone. I really wanted to celebrate with friends and after that kind of went bust up (I ended up having an entire hotel room all to myself, unable to get any friends to come out with me; the other friends who I knew were going, stayed at another hotel), I wished that I’d invited my boyfriend to join me. Though I had some fun, it was enough to make me not want to go to Vegas ever again.

Afterward, the boyfriend gifted me a WONDERFUL weekend of camping and biking near Fallingwater (we did a tour of the house and grounds, too). And we kayaked down river and made friends who rafted with Yuengling.

33 With my current boyfriend, again, we got a limo and took some friends over to watch some roller derby; then we invited everyone back to our downtown apartment in Cleveland to drink some Ice Tea Vodka (OMGoodness, I haven’t had that in so long!).

34 Shortly after my 34th birthday, I started this blog! I found myself in a weird space at the end of an odd age bracket and growing out of my “other” blog. Here’s a snippet of my weekend from a post on my other site though:

Friday, I rushed through my morning work schedule, so that I could walk around downtown — it was a gorgeous sunny day. I hit Franktuary for lunch, then wandered over to the Pittsburgh Public Market (for marshmallows and beer). After the boyfriend left work, I met him for a Happy Hour drink at NOLA in Market Square — totally hoping for some outdoor seating (sadly, no room on the patio) — while we discussed our night plans. Which was our first trip out to the Waterfront in Homestead, for comedy at the IMPROV (Jim Jefferies, FTW!). Then, we had WAY too much fun (think: Extreme “More Than Words”) at Sing Sing, Pittsburgh’s dueling piano bar.

Saturday: early rising to join 1,000+ “friends” for the Pedal Pale Ale Keg Ride. Of course, RAIN for the 6+ mile ride from downtown to the starting line at East End Brewing Company (and oh, holy hell, Penn Avenue I hate your elevation). The ride finished off at Penn Brew on the North Side (mmmm, love that warm German Potato Salad!), with thankfully no significant rain during that trip. Afterward, I definitely needed a Disco Nap, if I was going to survive the Dirty Ball. Which was SO MUCH FUN, Pittsburgh. And not an ankle was broken in my 6-inch heels! But there was dancing… LOTS of dancing. The sequins definitely made for an impression.

Sunday was fit for a grump, as I had to wake up early AGAIN (early, at least for how much vodka I had the night before) for a sunny afternoon game with the Pittsburgh Pirates. Oh, lookie there: The Buccos won for my birthday.

AND THEN I DID (something like) 18 LOADS OF LAUNDRY.

#todaywasagoodday

35 I had an MRI because of, what would be, ligament damage in my wrist. (Thanks, derby.) I remember (however, vaguely) having drinks and snacks at the bar at ELEVEN in Pittsburgh with my boyfriend. We did that, like, three years in a row. It was an awesome tradition and their desserts are BOMB.

36 I was dealing with the reality of a skin cancer diagnosis and having something of an identity crisis. 2013 was a really rough year overall for me.

37 I started off my day with a Bird of Prey experience at the National Aviary, and then enjoyed a wonderful hot stone massage. Based on my blog post about that day, it seemed that I was finally feeling less anxiety over my birthdays and my 30s in general.

38 Well, the week of my 38th birthday, I ran my first half marathon! For my weekend of celebration, we partied at Howl at the Moon and WOO-BOY, did we party! And then my dad came out to visit. It was such a fun weekend, even if I was a little stressed out pulling it all together.

39 Here we are, the LAST time that I will celebrate a year in my 30s. Look at how far we’ve come in ten years! This year’s a little different, of course, given that we’re in a new state. And we’ve explored a little more of our new home: On Saturday, we went to the Food Truck Throw Down in the city, hosted by Des Moines Social Club. And on Sunday, we went to Pella to look at the tulips — followed by lunch at Exile Brewing Company.

More on this year’s fun in a later post. But seriously: Would you be able to remember a decade’s worth of birthdays?

Let’s talk about Iowa

- Mel

Best small cities to live in. Source: WalletHub

Can you find Iowa on the map?
Yeah, admittedly, when we went for our first visit, we couldn’t either.

While not specifically mentioned in my Life List, I wanted to move outside of Ohio in my 30s. Actually, I wanted to in my 20s too, which I did, albeit temporarily, to Phoenix in 2004. We relocated five years ago to Pittsburgh and have loved it immensely — first living downtown before the big “boom” of the Cultural District and then living in an amazing neighborhood where we were able to sell our house in 9 days (!!!). I wrote about my conflicted experiences about “home” last year, then removed the post, because… there was something that made me feel unsettled about it; and with time for reflection, I think I finally know why. I want to move.

This last year has proved overwhelming at living a city lifestyle. For some reason, my desire for a more suburban, smaller (quiet) life is at critical mass. Maybe it’s age? Maybe it’s my social anxiety? Maybe it’s the noise… yeah, it’s partially the noise and the feeling that I’m drowning in busy-ness constantly. Maybe it’s just that a vibrant city life has worn out its welcome (on, in my opinion, is experiencing a “too big for its britches” moment). Maybe I miss the Midwest? And horses. I miss the horses.

We traveled to Des Moines in January to start the conversation about possible relocation — to learn about the city, shop houses with a Realtor… we even scheduled an executive tour of the downtown area and its suburbs. And since you now know about our official announcement, we obviously fell in love with our new home! So, we’re on the horizon of a move that’s quickly approaching.

The expressions on most friends’ faces (and the WTF comments) when they hear we’re moving to Des Moines tells us that most people don’t know much about Iowa. So, here’s a few articles to get you started:

How America’s Dullest City Got Cool {via Politico}
Iowa’s Heartland beyond the campaign trail {via NYT}
I’m not a hipster, but… Do the most hipster thing possible and move to Des Moines {via The Atlantic}
30 Things to Know Before Moving to Iowa {via Movoto blog}

52 Books in 52 Weeks: 30s Life List and Reading Challenge

- Mel

I read 52 books in 2015, and it’s something that I can finally cross off my 30s Life List. This was no small feat, as for most of the year I was reading my textbooks alongside reading for pleasure (and writing papers and running marathons). For the purpose of this project, I did include my textbooks because I read that shit at length and in full!

My Top 3 favorite books of the year:
#1 Elite Minds by Stan Beecham
#2 My Year With Eleanor by Noelle Hancock
#3 So You’ve Been Publicly Shamed by Jon Ronson

And the WORST:
#52 Five Weeks in the Amazon by Sean Hayes
#51 The Woman I Wanted to Be by Diane von Furstenberg (so bad that I had to go back to look up the title!)
… and the several books that I started (one, I even got 35% into) and never finished.

Book that surprised me the most (AKA: Fiction that I actually liked):
Judy Blume’s “In the Unlikely Event” — to be honest, I had low expectations of this book upon receiving it in a PopSugar MustHave box, aside from being a total fangirl of Blume’s books from my childhood. But I sincerely loved this story and its characters.

Book that I really, really wanted to like but really, really didn’t (AKA: the MEH Award):
Good Manners for Nice People Who Sometimes Say F*ck

I likely won’t pursue quite so lofty a reading challenge in 2016, but this goal had a purpose of getting me back to books and loving reading again — and that’s exactly what I accomplished.

This 30-something’s Wish List (my Top Five Things I Hope I Get For Christmas)

- Mel

Last holiday season, I made a Pinterest board: Gifts for 30-somethings. Most of my suggestions still hold up! And I’ve been pinning more items to it as the holiday approaches (it’s a super-easy way for the boyfriend to know exactly what I want).

Here are my Top Five this year:
1. SOCKS.
OMG, I am SUCH a 30-something — I wrote “socks” in response to basically every email to family asking for gift ideas. I need a couple pairs of these DryMax socks for running in winter [purchase here], but also these SmartWool socks for winter in general [purchase at REI and many outdoor stores]. MORE SOCKS!

2. YOGA ACCESSORIES
I don’t know how I keep losing my wide yoga headbands (blame the cats, I’m sure), but I needed a couple more to stash into my workout bags. Hindsight, I wish I would’ve asked for another Buff too.

3. BOOKS & SHIT
My multi-media list includes things to read and things to listen to — and something to write in (I guess you could say that I’m obsessed with journal books). But my Amazon Wish List is full of books that I want to read in the New Year (and yes, some adult coloring books). I also asked for a couple vintage vinyl records that are missing from my favorites collection: Blood, Sweat & Tears; Presidents of the United States of America; and King Harvest. Also in this category is a Five-Year Diary.

4. SPLURGE ITEM
How am I a young-ish urban professional and don’t own a black crossbody bag?! A stretch for my Wish List, but I’m currently coveting this black leather bag from Bartaile.

SWOON.
SWOON.

5. MORE RUNNING STUFF
Since marathon training, I realized that I could use a few additional items for next year’s cycle: a jar of Cytomax (yes, I really put this on my wish list, and please, only lemon-lime); a water belt — I currently use a handheld for my training runs which can get annoying during long runs (and is often, not enough water) and I need a smart way to carry all that Cytomax AND water; I also asked for a kettlebell for my at-home workouts — no idea where I’ll swing the dang thing but I’ll figure it out.

What’s on your Wish List?

Setting up habits for 2016 resolutions

- Mel

You know that saying about not waiting to make changes? How January 1 shouldn’t be the impetus for life changes — and that you should start making good habits TODAY?

Baby steps, people. Yes, I do agree that a date on the calendar is widely misused as a placeholder for resolutions. So whether you decide that January 1 or your half-birthday is the day that you want to set some new goals for yourself, have at it. But real, honest change will come if you start doing something now. Like, NOW now. I’m not saying that your life will instantly change in that moment, but if you want something new or different to take place, do something right this second that leads to that eventual start date.

Say for example that your resolution is to “lose weight” in 2016 — do you have an exercise plan, have you consulted with your doctor, have you researched the monthly cost and/or joined a gym, hired a trainer or nutritionist, pinned some healthier meal options on Pinterest, or thrown out all your gross processed stuff in the freezer? And what does “lose weight” mean? I hope your goal is SMART or CLEAR. I guess there are HARD goals now as well. Do you at least know how to increase your chances at success? Doesn’t it feel SO OVERWHELMING?

Baby steps. One foot in front of the other. One day at at time. Write a to-do list. Buy some new sneakers.

So, yeah, I have goals for 2016 — quite a few, actually. But if I don’t start changing some of my bad habits now, I will be setting myself up for a mess of frustration on January 1. And likely, failure, by March 15. I can’t let my already-good habits go by the wayside either.

An example of my own baby steps? Waking up at my first alarm. NOT sleeping through five different alarms. I’m seven days in! This will lead to a bigger goal. But for now? I get to celebrate some small successes (and hopefully help my sleep schedule out a little in the meantime).

More reading:
Mind Tools has a bunch of articles about goals. Check out this article about personal goal setting. There are some great explanations about the different methods (with more links to further explain) and questions to ask yourself before you get started with the process. And if you have a coach or mentor (or are one), I personally like use of the GROW model.

Update on my 30s Life List

- Mel

I recently cleaned up my 30s Life List, particularly noting some items that I’m not all that interested in completing (um, shoulder tattoos, Louboutins and photography lessons? NOPE.) and have widdled this list from 30-some items to only 22 — with only 5 items crossed off and another half-way attempt (while we’re here: I STILL haven’t had my piano tuned!). While this doesn’t feel very earth-shattering, I recognize some of the things that I’ve accomplished even in the last couple years that were not even on my radar when starting this list in my early 30s (running marathons, for starters; relocating to another city, for another). Lists like this are an interesting reminder about our life phases and personal growth.

That said, I realize that I’ve got some work to do in a year-and-a-half! But… yeah, most of the stuff on this list will be near impossible to achieve. Kilimanjaro, for one, will definitely not happen, but is still something that I would like to do. Eventually. I probably don’t have the motivation to train for kayaking at long distances either. (40-something goals?) Also, rather strangely, the list is a lot of what I want to DO… rather than who I’d like to BE. So, put a little of that in your pipe and smoke on it.

Anyways, I’ll definitely be crossing off two more of these items though before the end of the year, which is exciting! The 52 Books in 52 weeks goal is something that I’ve started and stalled on for the last couple years, and this year I’m going to make it. I guess I could spend that time next year on actually writing a book? It doesn’t feel like a priority goal for me but maybe it’s something that I start to consider again.

My, how my 30s have changed!

Congratulations, Graduate!

- Mel

This past weekend was special. My family joined me to celebrate my accomplishment of (finally!) completing my bachelor’s degree. I traveled to the commencement ceremony in Columbus, Ohio because it was important that I acknowledge this achievement in-person. I really wanted the opportunity to savor it — to meet my classmates and those who I worked with in online courses, to meet my senior capstone adviser, to nervous-chatter and laugh (and cry a little), and to really feel proud of myself.

And I did.

This goal was personally important to me, and I had so much support from my partner during the last couple years to return to school and finish. He gave me strength when I had none. He (smartly) did not give me answers when I needed them. At times, this was a serious struggle — especially balancing work and travel and other life responsibilities. And other times, it felt impossible to see it through. All the trips that we took for long weekends, and I had to lug with me a laptop and a few books. Weekends and evenings completely devoted to writing papers and attending class sessions. I gave up volunteering. I retired from roller derby.

My life was one big note tornado.

And it was all worth it. But I would be remiss if I didn’t mention the impact of that stress — up to and including the commencement ceremony. For starters, I never received confirmation of my final grades, possible honor status, and a degree audit… until I had to ask for that information. Nobody from the school provided details about the commencement ceremony, save for a static webpage that told me what time to be there. I received no President’s Letter for my final semester. I never heard from the program chair congratulating me on my completion.

And then my heart broke when I realized that our program’s graduates (and, yes, including me) were completely left out of the program book. I tried my best to not let that bring me down (but you bet your ass I emailed the Registrar’s Office to demand a reprint).

I won’t do too much cheerleading here, but know that if you have a goal like changing careers or going back to school in your 30s: it will seem impossible, and you find yourself continually struggling with the day-to-day and wondering how to juggle life. It is all worth that final moment of walking across the stage and seeing that piece of paper with your name on it. To hear your parents or partner or kids tell you how proud they are too. Don’t ever let your age stop you from making changes in your life.

IMG_1664

For the record, I graduated Summa Cum Laude. Yep, that level of dedication was all worth it.

2015 Goals: Halfway Check-in

- Mel

Like others in the blogosphere, I created a list of Running Goals for 2015. Prompted by Chelsea of Pittsburgh City Girl, I wanted to do my own mid-year check-in.

1. Finish my half marathon in 2:20: YEP!
2. 100 individual runs and 500 miles: Based off my training journal, I have 44 recorded runs so far this year (MapMyRun dashboard gives me 51, but I know that I tracked a few courses to work to determine how far I was walking every day); also according to MapMyRun, I’ve logged 195.18 miles so far. I expect while continuing to train for the full, this number to jump exponentially.
3. One race per month: ERRRRRR *buzzer noise* I messed this up already in January; however, I have completed one race a month since April, and I have a race scheduled for every month for the duration of 2015.
4. Get a 5K sub-30 time, which wasn’t identified in that particular post, but was on my goal list: YEP!

As I’m moving through the foundation weeks of my training into the meat of my plan, here are some other goals I’m setting:
1. THREE runs per week. I don’t care if that third run is only a mile. Three times.
2. I need to research speed work, since it’s coming up in my plan; with that, 1x/week speed work.
3. Weight training! Ugh, why do I keep slipping on this? I’m doing a lot of body weight workouts, but I need to get into the weight room and lift some heavy shit. I won’t be unrealistic here, so I’m planning for 1x/week to start, with the eventual goal of 2x/week as I approach my half marathon in August.
4. YOGA. Our work-site lunchtime yoga program has ended, but I really enjoyed that break away from my desk every week. The PNC YMCA has its own lunchtime yoga sessions twice a week (and I already pay for a Y membership), so I’ll pick a day and make it part of my regular schedule. I fully intend to continue going to run//yoga club on Wednesday evenings so long as that’s still happening. My goal is to keep up with my 2x/week plan.
5. Run AT LEAST once a month with SCRR. I have this amazing group at my disposal, and keep making excuses for not joining in on the training runs (and not setting my alarm for weekends). I really had fun at Open Streets last weekend with the group, and I love my Wednesday night running group. Plus, I’m going to need that support when I start approaching these double-digit weeks.

How are you doing on your goals so far this year?

List of 10 things I do every morning

- Mel

1. Drink a glass of water… and take my Vitamin D3.
2. Brush my teeth; wash my face.
3. If I haven’t already, feed the cats. Then drip the faucets because that meow-ing will inevitably come soon.
4. Drink a couple mugs of coffee.
5. Stretch. Some sun salutations if I wake up early enough.
6. Eat some oatmeal or gluten-free cinnamon-raisin toast.
7. Pack my lunch, if it’s a work day; consult with the boyfriend about daily meal plan, if not.
8. Make sure I have my keys, wallet/work badge, sunglasses, and umbrella. And a snack if I’m running errands. Headphones, if I plan to listen to a podcast on my walk to work.
9. Decide on walking shoes or dress shoes, and pack day bag accordingly (make sure I have Band-aids).
10. Make a list for my day and consult weekly to-do and calendar.