Author: Mel

Weekly Therapy: needs more room service

- Mel

the week:
I spent most of my week in Buffalo… doing nothing but work. I forgot my book, which made me do even more work. Even online distractions didn’t sway my production. Even though I decided not to explore the city (um, it was 22 degrees, nothankyou), I had something of a writing retreat, so it’s a win in my book.

When I got back, I had an interview for a part-time boutique position. I should find out some time next week about that…

weekend:
Friday night is GIRLS NIGHT OUT (special holiday gift exchange edition). I hope you make time for your girlfriends this busy season because we all need a release from the stressors (and holiday triggers). And wine. We NEED wine. (and in our case, cheesecake.) Check out the gorgeous earrings I got from my “Secret Santa” (also, a gift card to Starbucks for eggnog lattes so she doesn’t have to bring them to me anymore. ha!):

I promise, my finger is NOT that stubby in real life.

If you’re in Pittsburgh, pick up some unique gifts at Handmade Arcade on Saturday (11am-7pm) downtown at the Convention Center. Then Sunday, come see ROLLER DERBY! It’s our annual Toys for Tots charity scrimmage, so bring a toy for a child who needs a special Christmas.

52 books update:
So, I’ve finished four books since Thanksgiving. Not a bad start!
Kelly Cutrone’s If You Have to Cry, Go Outside
Nixon’s Darkest Secrets
Stop the Wedding! (A Romantic Comedy) – a random, silly book that Kindle store recommend; super easy read

seven things, seven days:
1. Christmas shopping started! (and finishing this weekend); Boyfriend is proving to be more difficult to shop for this year. Men.
2. Also, writing out all the Christmas cards. (I’m early!)
3. I’m hosting a bridal shower for a friend; check out these cute invites from Wedding Paper Divas.
4. WINE ICE CREAM!!!
5. Holiday shopping doesn’t mean I didn’t pick up a lil’ something for myself (duh!): this sequin sweatshirt from GAP is so fun (and comfy! And was 30% off.)
6. Bloggers Elsie & Emma from A Beautiful Mess geek out about Tea. More tea-geeking, please!
7. The Psychology of everything in 48 Minutes from Paul Bloom:

Crest Whitestrips for your 30-something yellowing teeth!

- Mel

I joined this unknown online community a couple months ago, and only recently started receiving products to review and share. Called Influenster, it’s a place for “culture junkies to come together and share their unique opinions of products and experiences.” Active members get exclusive access to deals, promotions, and products from brand. And since I’m already a person of influence online and off, I wanted to share this community and its brands with you (if you want an invite, leave me a comment!).

My first Box included a product that I already use on a semi-regular basis: Crest 3D White Strips.

And I can openly admit here that my teeth whitening regimen has recently gone the way of non-existence… because if you’re not whitening you’re yellowing! I even had a package of the 5-minutes-a-day white strips UNOPENED in my bathroom’s beauty closet. As a 30-something — and lover of daily coffee and happy hours filled with red wine, which I have no plans to give up either — I experience tooth discoloration. And by all means, I don’t want to appear OLDER. So, I was happy to get back into the habit of daily whitening with this product.

Well, I lasted about three days before I had SIGNIFICANT teeth sensitivity (it usually ceases in a day or two); however, I was already seeing results. After THREE DAYS. Regardless, I lessened the treatments to twice a week because the sensitivity proved to be too much. Hey, I have a few extra days worth in the treatment calendar now!

From Crest: “sensitivity from tooth whitening is common and varies from person to person, and can be expected when using peroxide-based tooth whiteners like Crest® Whitestrips. We wanted to make sure you were aware that tooth sensitivity is a temporary side effect of any whitening treatment, does not cause any permanent damage to your teeth, and should go away soon, if it hasn’t already. If you notice continued tooth whitening sensitivity, consult with your dental professional.”

Based on the Whitestrips I’ve used in the past, I love the upgrade to the Advanced Seal — these strips stick to your teeth very well. And while I didn’t take before pictures, trust me, this is a product that works.

Disclosure: I received a free product from Influenster, for personal use, under no bias for compensation or review. Thoughts and opinions contained within are my own and only from personal experience. See my disclosure page for more information.

30 Days, 30 Posts Challenge: COMPLETE!

- Mel

And here is December! Whew. I did it! I published 30 posts in 30 days. Even with a vacation and a road trip under my belt for November! Yes, I subsequently took a couple days soon after the 11/30 deadline.

What I hoped to achieve:
Find this blog’s direction and purpose. Find other bloggers (especially other therapists or counselors, or wannabes, in their 30s) in my niche. Find if the topics I wrote about — or were interested in — would resonate with 30-something Readers.

What I learned:
I was devoted. I was determined to finish. I even made some new online friends. When put to task and under stress and the all-too-ubiquitous “I’m busy,” I had something to prove — to you or to me?! Isn’t that kind of statement always some kind of unnecessary pressure to ourselves to complete goals?

Well, because of all that, I have a new passion: to share my personal experiences and lifestyle as a 30-something woman to evoke a reaction, a response — heck, a follow-ship! And thank you for reading along.

Going forward:
More guest posts like this. More pictures. Regularly-scheduled themed posts like this. And this. MORE 30-something awesomeness. Definitely more shoes.

Did you participate in either Nanowrimo or the 30 Days of Posts challenges? Leave your blog link in the comments!

Weekly Therapy: a lil’ bit of this, a lil’ bit of that

- Mel

the week:
Back home. Back to work. Back to skating practices. Back to training. Back to eating healthier. Back to kitty snuggles.

Don’t they all look thrilled?

Back to a certain level of life craziness and stress, I suppose too. I need to get back to yoga and back to reading…

weekend:
O, Christmas tidings! It has begun — the holiday season is in full swing. And we’re doing some decorating of our own this weekend (hello, 55 degree weather!). I’m not too keen on the concept of a real tree in a household containing three cats, but O CHRISTMAS TREE, this is going to be fun (proving the boyfriend wrong, that is). And I need to visit RECORD STORE to find myself some Bing Crosby.

If you’re in the Pittsburgh area, check out the Warhol Holiday Bash with the one-and-only Sharon Needles, I Made it Market – Holiday Edition, COOKIES!!!! (ahem, Lawrenceville Cookie Tour) and Christmas Cartoon Fest at the Toonseum (and say “hey!” to Randy from A Christmas Story).

seven things, seven days:
1. Ever since I put a doughnut baking pan on my Christmas list, I’ve been mad-craving doughnuts. Like THESE.
2. Signed up for marathon relay team for this upcoming May (yes, we really named ourselves #teamstabby)
3. LOVE this scalloped felt skirt idea
4. We got our first snow fall of the year; nothing significant (and nothing stuck). And it’s going to be 55 degrees this weekend. WEIRDNESS.
5. Do not order the skinny peppermint mocha — it means “sugar free”… not fat free. I thought they only subbed in skim milk, not one of those fake-sugar-substitute flavorings. Blech!
6. From Apartment Therapy: a few ways to decompress this holiday season
7. And a completely gratuitous, musical start to your weekend: It’s Britney, betch.

Have an amazing first weekend of December!

Every 30-something needs: A Quiet Space

- Mel

Reading, meditation, yoga, napping: all 30-somethings need a space in our home — indoor or out — that is a designated Quiet Space.

To unwind, recharge, be creative, learn something new, be crafty, get away from husbands/kids/pets.

This space can change, depending on weather and circumstances, of course. I used to like our living room… until a TV was put into it. I like our outdoor patio area… but it’s a bit too cold in my neck-of-the-woods. The bedroom is super comfortable… but being an insomniac, I have to use it as JUST a sleeping space to curb any extraneous distractions.

My preferred area is a little nook in my attic-slash-third-bedroom. After turning our second, conjoined bedroom into our sitting/media room, we freed the upstairs finished attic space into a reading and sleeping area. While it could certainly use some temperature regulation (and probably some new carpet), it’s cozy and peaceful.

Perfect for my 52 books in 52 weeks project.

Total hilarious side note: those IKEA chairs? They had to be taken apart to fit up the attic stairwell. We have a helluva time finding furniture to fit into our small rowhouse. Originally, the boyfriend’s “bachelor” apartment living set was to be there — wouldn’t fit. My work desk? Wouldn’t fit. When we purchased a new mattress set, the delivery person had to return the box spring because IT WOULDN’T FIT. But happy ending small space bonus: queen-sized mattress sets can be purchased with a two-piece box spring! I’m still holding onto hope that a papasan chair will fit up here.

What type of Quiet Space do you prefer?

30s Life List: 52 Books in 52 Weeks

- Mel

Do you have a Life List or Bucket List?

I have a few items on mine.

One, is a goal to get back to reading. I love reading — or, at least I did at one point in my life — but I haven’t made the time to do so. In fact, I spend WAY too much time mindlessly trolling the internet instead. This, a shutdown mode of my multi-tasking brain in overdrive, which doesn’t allow me to watch a television show or movie OR sleep like a normal person. Ultimately, with my intent to return to school next Fall, I need to get my brain in shape.

Goal setting promotes motivation and focus. By setting clearly-defined goals, you can take pride in the achievement of tasks that initially may seem lengthy or impossible. As you progress through the steps of “goal work,” you embrace challenges and overcome obstacles, ultimately succeeding at something that makes you very happy.

I attempted the 52 books challenge last year, but derby responsibilities got in the way. I need to make time to unwind though even from that, and reading helps me do that. By this time next year, I want to have 52 books — of all topics, lengths and genres — completed.

I’ll be keeping a weekly log here (I also created a Google Doc) to help me track. I’ve completed my first book since Thanksgiving week (via Kindle), and halfway into my second (checked out from the local library). I read two books at one time; it’s weird, but I’m always getting ready to finish one while I’m already started into another. Remember that aforementioned multitasking brain? It’s a blessing and a curse. I like the convenience of bringing my Kindle everywhere, yet still enjoy the page turning of real books (book stacks and shelves make me happy). I can love and appreciate both.

Week 1, Book 1:
1. “My Mother Was Nuts” by Penny Marshall

I’m also in the middle of “Nixon’s Darkest Secrets” and starting Kelly Cultrone’s “If You Have to Cry, Go Outside” (should be a quick-and-easy read) and have two others that go back to the library next week on my “to finish” list. And another two just received from Amazon (I suppose these two from Malcolm Gladwell could wait a bit though).

Ambitious? There’s no other way.

51 books left to go!

More about Goals from a Psych perspective: The Paradox of Goal Setting from Psychology World — takeaway: don’t fear failure, and do your best without focusing on the results.

Please recommend a good book in the comments!

Off, Spot!

- Mel

Age spots. Sun spots. Livers spots. OFF, SPOT!

Spot removers and skin brighteners: yet more treatments in the arsenal of beauty products aimed at our age bracket. The promise? Younger, brighter skin that’s free from discoloration, age spots and uneven tone. These anti-aging creams promise to reduce, fade and prevent freckling and splotching of discolored 30-something skin caused by sun damage, acne scarring and those lovely (lovely!) hormones. If only a magic serum were that easy.

Yeah… wrong kinda spot.

My skin has become a MESS over the last couple years of my mid-30s: blotchy areas, loose skin around the eyes (including my first few wrinkles), enlarged pores, the eyebrow “parenthesis,” dark circles, adult acne, and age spots. While aging is an ultimate concern in the physical sense, I didn’t realize how hard this stage would be mentally. And financially.

Besides regularly visiting an aesthetician for facials, I’m currently enduring a months-long wait for a dermatology appointment (completely separate from my wait for my skin cancer screening) to see what else can be done — how I can FIX and PREVENT more of this from happening. Meanwhile, I’m trying out a sample of this Murad Age Spot & Pigment Lightening Serum to see if I can be part of the 33% (of users to see a difference in 1 week; a couple weeks in, I’m having limited success in reducing redness scars, not yet on brown pigment spots).

murad spot remover for 30-somethings

Have you found a spot remover that works? Tell us about it in the comments — or on our Facebook page!

Birthday Milestones & Growing Up

- Mel

It’s not my birthday, but someone close to me is celebrating her 30th — or “Dirty Thirty” as she termed it — and I was invited to the shindig… in Vegas.

The only city in the country I never want to step another foot into.

I’ve been twice — the first, in my late 20s, on a sisters vacation during Halloween. It was a blast and perfect for four siblings in various stages of relationships (me = single). The second, was my birthday celebration. Number 32 (me = newly coupled with the guy I remain with today).

That 32nd birthday there was spent practically by myself, after friends who frequently travel (there and otherwise) backed out of the adventure plans. I had a couple friends there to party with, but they stayed in another hotel, further down the Strip, and I constantly felt like a fifth wheel. They were from Denver; me, living in Ohio at the time; and they also left a day earlier than me, so I drank by the pool alone for my last day of vacation. The one girl who took all the pictures of that trip NEVER SENT ME PICS. Never tagged me on Facebook. Lame.

I seriously made the offering to acquiantances I partied with to “just fly here; the room is already paid for!” And yet, no takers. I was in aforementioned-happy relationship, but desperately wanted a “friends trip” (I’ve still never been invited on one, which depresses me); I even invited the boyfriend out with me at the last minute (he couldn’t go).

It was one of the loneliest vacations of my life (this, from a person who traveled to Europe by herself). And, sadly, I learned a lot about friendships surrounding that incident. That one trip essentially changed my life in a completely different way I imagined. I was in my 30s, and it was time to grow up. And I did.

So, when I hear of people going to Vegas for some big Life Event or Age Turning, I make that face.

Or something…

I have no desire to return to this City of Lights. It’s probably not Vegas’ fault, but I hate it there. I mean, truly loath. I associate it with so much negativity — and I refuse to have that sort of energy in my life. Let’s be frank here too, I’m definitely not into that sort of club scene anymore (not even close) and somebody reaching the Big 3-0 milestone seems SO. MUCH. YOUNGER. than where I am right now (yes, I said it out loud! feel free to smack me!).

So much different than what I am now.

Gah. Have you reached that point in your 30s where you feel so much *gulp* older? Do you have a city that you refuse to return to, for one reason or another?

Weekly Therapy: on vacation

- Mel

I had intentions of posting a variety of pictures from my trip… But when using the most recent backup from my old phone to set up my new phone, the pictures were gone. *sigh*

So you get a picture of my splurge from Black Friday:

20121124-125832.jpg

No discount from Apple — save for signing a new contract with Verizon device discount — but so much nicer to blog from! And I didn’t have to wake at some crazy hour to get it. I also purchased it when tipsy from hoppy beers, so there’s that.

Did you make any big Black Friday purchases? What was your best deal?