Intro to Data Science: Python Fundamentals (lol)
Preventing Trauma post Covid-19
Coronavirus and Youth Sports: What the Future Holds
How to Play During Covid-19 (sports-related – featured Omar Vizquel!!!)
Partnership Webinar: Drake Athletics Challenges & Pivots
Going Digital: Online Consulting for Mental Performance
Solving Sparrows (so much thanks to the North Branch Nature Center in Vermont for this!)
Can you remember things from as far back as grade school? I have a few very fuzzy memories of kindergarten but my brain really wanted to hold onto some random memories from first grade. Maybe it was because it was Catholic school and the nuns want to continue to punish me.
There’s this meme that gets passed around Facebook often in the vein of “you were a child of the 70s and 80s if you remember this.” And it’s a picture of Rainbow Parachute Day. EVERYBODY loved parachute day as a kid…
Unless you were me and it triggered the memory of being locked inside a racquetball room in the gym of your Catholic school before cell phones were invented.
Time is a funny thing. With the passing of many, many years the details get murkier about how long we spent in that locked room. It could have been two minutes, it could have been 20. It could have been 2 hours. What I do remember is someone (maybe the gym teacher?) attempting to MacGyver the door lock with a shoelace.
If you can believe it, there is something even MORE triggering about Catholic school and gym days. Brown shorts and yellow shirts. So fug. We had no access to the bathrooms and were required to change in the room in front of everyone – gender separated thank Jesus – with the boys (of course) peeking into the classroom window frequently enough that they were reprimanded against doing so. Which then made us very aware that this was A Thing.
You know what else was A Thing? Me getting sent to the principal’s (head nun’s?) office because I dared to wear unapproved colored socks with my hideously-colored plaid school uniform.
Then, as in now, you can’t get me to follow your silly fashion rules.
But a rule that I will continue to follow based on my first grade experience is to never look directly at the sun during a solar eclipse. The end.
Extra Reading:
This is where your childhood memories went {via Nautilus}
Being game is about being willing to give something a whirl, and happily so.
— from American Savage
My current book didn’t have anything on Page 202, so I went with the last paragraph on Page 203:
String theory predicts that our physical existence requires somewhere between ten and twenty-six dimensions. Our emotional universe surely has that many and more. And in combining these spaces — our interior landscape with our external world — we can portray existence with a new depth.
— from Dataclysm
Want to share your bibliotherapy? Post in the comments your excerpt from Page 202, Last Paragraph from the book you’re currently reading.
I wrote this post a couple months ago, but I really feel that it should be outside of draft status.
I’ve been thinking a lot about transformations lately, which has spurred from so many different directions and mediums. An email found its way to my inbox, requesting an update from an article written about me in 2006 (and my single life), for one. This person, I’m sure with good intentions, basically wanted to know if I ended up “happy”… but also wanted to know about the dating scene in Cleveland. The latter, I’m sure is awful (because isn’t it awful everywhere); the former: undoubtedly, yes.
[Ed note: I never responded to the letter, and yes, I told my partner about it.]
Ultimately, the whole thing left me feeling exposed all over again. I didn’t really like feeling exposed then (yes, despite agreeing to have the magazine do an article about me), and particularly now, my former life (and all its mishaps and misadventures) feels like some deep secret that I need to keep closeted away.
Prior to this email, I was equally caught off-guard when catching up on my Rich Roll podcast, to hear the infamous name of a fellow blogger (some would probably call us both douchebags or some derivative in our collective blogger heyday): Tucker Max. We both reveled in a lifestyle of partying and drinking and sipping up every opportunity to be wild and independent of really any responsibility. Those were our 20s. And in the early blogging days, bloggers like us wrote about their dating exploits — the good, the sad, the cringe-worthy, and the total destruction of messy break-ups and subsequent loneliness. He, obviously, wrote a lot more about the sex.
[Read: Tucker Max gives up the game {via Forbes}]I broke up with my old blog (and its identity) years ago and never looked back. I experienced growth far beyond that identity (even if there are still many who refuse to believe that a person can change — family included). There was an inherent shame that was soon evident, attaching my online persona to that of Real Life Me, which affected me deeply both personally and, I honestly think, professionally, despite my feelings of pride at the time. People made me feel really, really bad about who I was. So I did a lot of soul-searching and friend searching and acceptance searching — in a lot of bad ways. For a lot of years. But it took a lot of digging in to uncover what was truly going to make me happy (was I not happy?). Make me even a better person (was I really that terrible or that different from any other single 20-something person?). In any event, that type of lifestyle was sure to run its course, and it did, and I have evolved. And I’ve moved on.
What took the longest was my self-worth. That I was worthy of praise and accomplishment and, most of all, love. That’s a ridiculous thing to admit, right? But man… I felt so damned and worthless for a huge bulk of my early adulthood. And it was all online. Exposed. Shamed.
I think that’s what made reading Jon Ronson’s “So You’ve Been Publicly Shamed” so… pained for me. The differences in actions and behaviors of shaming so abunduntly different online versus real life, but wholly affecting the person subjected to this public display of admonishment in BOTH. That pain, I think, lingers deep and long. And even more sad (and a lot more recent), Bullies came out like cockroaches despite the best efforts in pest control.
I found peace in my transformations, to be sure, and I don’t go searching for anyone’s permission or acceptance to living my own life… but that email definitely stirred up some bad memories.
More reading: How does one go about re-inventing oneself? For me, it wasn’t so much calculated as it was maturity and experience. And an absence of naivete. Letting go of things that no longer serve you, so they say. My buddy Justin (if you followed that link at the beginning of this paragraph) sums it up so succinctly: All you have to do is think differently and act accordingly.
Inbox Zero is the name of the game in my gmail world. I have to mark everything as read, even if I didn’t read it, with intention of returning to the email at a later date if it’s a) important or b) interesting. Anything else is filed away into specific folders or deleted immediately.
If you thought my blog post drafts were random, check this list out:
1. “Unwrap your NARS birthday gift” from Sephora: Need to order something stat.
2. Tweet by PBSAmerMasters, emailed to myself: A reminder to watch the American Ballet Theater film that is available online.
3. “Beginner’s Yoga for Relaxation #4” from a YouTube “latest videos” email from JANUARY: Still haven’t watched it; I’m sure I can bookmark this in a better manner.
4. Oh, and a “Relaxation or Bedtime Yoga Routine” from February.
5. “Notification of Federal Loan Servicer Agreement” from you-know-who. *sigh*
6. “Your Fabletics return label” for a package to return (for Matthew in LA) that I received. My printer at home is broken right now, so…
7. “Music Performance Anxiety Assessments” from my Div47 listserv: Thought it might be useful for a later class, given our use of assessments and my interest in performance psychology. Filed to the right folder now.
8. Oh, yay! My POPSUGAR MustHave box is on its way!
9. Also, so are my replacement running shoes, per this email from Zappos.com Customer Service.
10. Private Coaching/Weekly Program email response that I’m sitting on, regarding my marathon training plan.
I’ve passed my 100 Day mark for eliminating gluten and nightshades from my diet. Replacements are fairly easy for gluten (breads, cereals… poptarts) save for finding potato flour and an abundance of sugar or swapped starches in a lot of items (most packaged sweets are gross, tbh). Nightshades are still really difficult, especially when out dining (and I’ve turned into this neurotic TELL ME ALL THE INGREDIENTS visitor when scanning menus). I’ve been to a neighbor’s dinner party and hosted a cookout where I shared my dietary restrictions with anyone and everyone (I really wish my sister would listen!). And annoyed a whole bunch of people via social media about the who/why/what. Yet, I’m still surprised at the ignorance of many about WHAT gluten is (clue: it’s not a wheat allergy!).
The diet started out as basically cutting all gluten products; now I am replacing, which I feel very… meh about because I still eat so.many.carbs. So I want (and plan to) do better in my next 100 Days. Pinterest has saved our marriage (lol); we plan meals ahead, and I can even swap out some ingredients in Blue Apron without a lot of waste. But planning ahead is SUPER important to combat the HANGRY. The use of Day One app has been incredibly helpful to log meals and any possible reactions.
A few days of “testing” my sensitivity proved to be BIG mistakes. On one occasion, after a particularly amazing 5-course meal, I couldn’t get out of bed to check out of the hotel. It was awful. I also tried a gluten-free beer in NYC (oh, did I mention that I’m additionally sensitive to hops? Yeah, that made me feel like crap too). And then I went and drank a bunch of whiskeys and bourbons this weekend at the UGP. These were not controlled testings (aside from the gf beer), so I have no clue what is the bigger culprit of wrecking havoc on my body (mostly joints): gluten or nightshades.
I’m incredibly grateful for Emily Levenson for helping me through this journey.
Alas, I realize this is for life, which makes me as sad as it makes me relieved. And I know that white potatoes are the devil. The end.
If you need a resource to learn more about gluten and Celiac disease or gluten sensitivities, I highly recommend reading: Gluten Freedom.
Still think gluten sensitivities are bullshit? Read this. And focus on the last sentence. {via glutenfreegirl}
Thankful for: the last two months off derby to clear my head, refocus and recharge. AND spend more “free” time with the boyfriend and friends.
Thankful for: the physical ability to run and CrossFit and skate and yoga to keep my mental sanity (and get a great ass in the meantime).
Thankful for: the boyfriend’s support — mentally and financially — in my (seemingly) never-ending job search.
Thankful for: having an extra dining room chairs to seat additional adults at Thanksgiving dinner.
Thankful for: my boyfriend being responsible for planning, purchasing and making said dinner.
Thankful for: spending the holiday with my sisters, nieces and dad.
Thankful for: having a blended family get-together.
Thankful for: an upcoming week off in December to travel.
Thankful for: these three cats that keep me warm in winter with furry snuggles.
Thankful for: feeling more like “me”… and getting back to the things I love.
…when you can’t remember why you started dating a (now, ex) boyfriend. And why do I want to even remember?
…when you can’t remember whether or not you slept with that guy from years ago. Seriously.
…when your boyfriend is celebrating the birthday that YOU were celebrating when you first started dating. Woof.
…your car is almost 10 years old. That’s a senior citizen in car years.
…when you read your old blog, and you want to go back and punch your younger self. *punch*
Dreams can be characterized as ideas, feelings and images that take shape in the mind, primarily during REM sleep when your brain experiences the highest amount of unconscious activity. Though the purpose of dreams is not entirely known, there are many theories as to why you dream and what your dreams could mean. Here is some information about why we dream, what your dreams could mean according to the experts, and how you can interpret your dreams.
Again, why we dream is not necessarily clear, though man has developed many theories over the last five thousand years or so. The Ancient Greeks and Romans believed that dreams were direct communications from the dead or from the gods, and that they had the power to predict the future. Many other cultures have considered dreams to be prophetic. The scientific study of dreaming is called oneirology, which has lead scientists to believe that many animals also dream as humans do. Also, in modern times, psychoanalysts Sigmund Freud and Carl Jung have linked dreams to a connection with the unconscious, and have suggested that dreams act as manifestations of desires and relate to repressed memories and obsessions.
Just like the reasons for why we dream, dream meanings have been disputed over thousands of years. Given that dreams are personal and unique, it is difficult to describe what specific images may mean. However, given that people do experience similar images, ideas or emotions in common dreams, many dream experts have developed theories in regards to what certain images may mean to everyone who dreams them. For example, many people have had dreams where they are chased either by a person or possibly imaginary monsters or animals. Some experts believe that these chasing dreams suggest that the dreamer is running from an issue in their waking life that causes anxiety or pain, and that the dreamer has been avoiding this issue. This is a practical interpretation that can be useful to dreamers seeking clarification of what their dream could mean.
When looking to have your dreams interpreted, it’s important not to jump to conclusions about what your dreams could mean. Though the jury is still out on what dreams may mean, there are experts in the field, from scientific, philosophical and spiritual backgrounds, who can help you interpret your dreams. Psychoanalysts, therapists, and other professionals are always available for counsel, though you will likely have to pay for their services. Psychics and other spiritual advisers are also available for a fee, but many of them also have online resources available for free. Also, because most people are curious about their dreams, many online resources that are free to the public may be able to shed light on what your dreams mean, though the information has likely not been vetted or confirmed by any paid professional. Dreams are largely still a mystery, but that doesn’t mean dream interpretation should only be left up to the experts or denied importance. If you’re looking for answers about your dreams and what they could mean, do your research by going online, asking your friends, or consulting a professional.