golf

2019 Goals and Reflecting on last year

- Mel

At yoga last week, a friend commented on how much I’ve changed in a year. We attend this weekly community yoga class lead by the awesome Ben Spellman (Good Vibes Yoga, for those not in the know) – and his classes typically start by introducing yourself to others in the room accompanied by a hug.

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credit: Hugs are Nice

The thought of giving hugs to strangers one year ago made me shiver in ick and roll my eyes at the general woo-woo feelings of it all. I generally stayed around my own mat, hugging a couple friends and awkwardly received a few strangers but ultimately felt really, really uncomfortable. I play a contact sport where I have to actively touch my teammates and they sweat all over me and yet I was wrapped in anxiety over a stranger giving me a hug.

That was last year. If you meet me at one of those yoga sessions now, I am actively seeking out people I don’t know in the room and freely giving hugs. #sorrynotsorry

Doing this small act had a big impact on me. Getting over the weirdness of it was a first step; gaining the happiness and connectedness over doing so was a far greater and deeper soul-enriching benefit.

The theme that keeps coming up for me, when reflecting on this last year and brainstorming on how I want 2019 to go, is: DOING. As in, DOING THE WORK.

Or maybe, likely, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!

I’m trying not to have an existential crisis this year, but at times it feels like it. Because I am 41 (howwwwww is my birthday already 4 months away again?!), it is likely sprinkled with a dose of Erikson’s stagnation stage and a dash of a midlife crisis.

By the time I close out 2019, I will be 42 AND done with grad school. Now, I don’t know if that means I’ll have my actual degree yet (because internship hours and completed/approved thesis and what-not), but my actual coursework will be completed. I have to do the work, else I won’t be prepared to present my thesis or pass my oral exam. Or be prepared for any of my upcoming internships. Or to DO THE ACTUAL WORK that comes after completing my degree in sport psychology. What will my consultant business look like? What type of athletes will I be working with? What other state certifications or licensure might I need?

Doing the work also includes incorporating some of the mental skills training techniques into my OWN athletic pursuits. I’m aiming to complete another half marathon this year (Drake Road Races in April) – maybe a marathon in the fall if I stay healthy. And I’m back to playing roller derby in 2019! I’m also doing my first barbell competition this year. And I’m signing up for my first women’s 9-hole golf league. 😬

I think a lot about doing the work, but rarely sit down and take the time to, you know, actually do it.

2018 tested my strength and purpose a lot. When my anxiety is triggered in certain situations — my self-worth in danger — I often relied upon my safety behaviors of avoidance. Like, I wanted to quit everything… including grad school. And not because I didn’t want to learn and pursue this new career, but because it was hard and I was exposed and my intelligence was challenged. Too often in my life I have followed the easy path because of its soft blanket of comfort. And 2018 was finally when I started therapy to change these maladaptive behaviors. I plan to continue this work into 2019. I go to sessions weekly, and together with my therapist we’re challenging a lot of stuff that is uncomfortable (and a lot of times, incredibly sad and defeating when it comes to my core beliefs). Talking about going to therapy and my social anxiety openly – and DOING the work of therapy – has honestly been really helpful. Wrapped in a bow, those ideas summarize what I plan to do more of in 2019 – be more open, more vulnerable…

And give more hugs.

Extra credit:
Want to track your habits? There’s an app for that. But it might not be as effective as you think. {via Vox}
Science says you need more hugs. {via Time}
How to balance Learning and Doing {via For the Interested} for THIS truth gem: “Learning is tempting because it’s hard to “fail” at it. This also makes it an attractive place to hide from the more important work of doing — work that likely will include failure.”

Weekly Therapy: 08.04.17

- Mel

the week:
I’ve had a pretty awful go of the PMS this week. I’m dealing with an awful ingrown hair (which I used PTO to visit my doctor about, and basically got instructions for warm compresses and a script for an antibiotic). My dentist finally sent me to an endodontist to check out a tooth that has been super sensitive and causing deferred pain in other teeth for over two years; so, I got a root canal this week (I guess the molar has experienced “trauma” and is inflamed, which is why it’s been bothering me, but no infection).

Did I mention how a small animal somehow got into my car overnight and left his smeared prints and scratches on the INSIDE of my windshield? (See also: WTF?!) And then a WASP hit my side mirror and bounced into my car. I didn’t know it was a wasp at first, until I turned around and found it sitting on my back WHILE I WAS DRIVING. I frantically flicked it off me, and pulled over to a gas station a mile down the road to shoo it out. I couldn’t find it. I STILL HAVEN’T FOUND IT. I’m terrified that it’s lying dormant underneath my gas pedal and is going to crawl up my pant leg one day.

You ever have one of those weeks?

weekend:
Going to the “Glow with the Flow” yoga event tonight at Brenton Skating Plaza (so excited for this!), and I have another massage on Sunday (praise, Jesus). Waiting to see if any of this rain hits us overnight Saturday; if not, our trail group may travel up to Ledges to get some elevation fun on the legs.

Long run Saturday with the Striders, as is tradition!

seven things, seven days:
1. Hey there, 50% off sale stuff, J.Crew!
2. Why is a nude sports bra so hard to find?
3. Do Not Be Afraid of Your Dinner: Louie’s Wine Dive is doing a gluten-free meal event! (YAY!)
4. My golf clinics are done for the summer, and I miss the weekly lessons. If they don’t do another session in Fall, I’m likely going to sign up for private lessons again. Dare I say that I actually enjoy it!?
5. Am I the only one irritated by a LARGE local race that is promoting a certain on-the-course product that isn’t even available to purchase locally ANYWHERE?!
6. Eh, that medal doesn’t excite me either. #subtweet
7. Oh, man, is this an excellent article about The Barkley Marathons {via Esquire}

Accountability Monday: 06/20-06/26

- Mel

Well, my burpees streak came to an end on Tuesday. I laid in bed that night thinking that I could quickly get in 20… but I was mentally and physically exhausted. My new job role has kind of sapped my energy as of late. And then over the weekend, I was playing with the cat on the floor, pushed myself up (think: regular ol’ pushup position) and felt my entire chest pop and tear (I know that I’m being hyperbolic, but definitely something got tweaked something awful). It was on fire for a couple hours afterward, too.

This is some 30-something realness for you: Getting injuries doing something completely unrelated to working out.

In any event, I continued with my overall consistency goal of running three times per week (hooray!). And here are the other weekly goals that I completely failed on (boo!): 108 Sun Salutations for Summer Solstice (I never had time to commit to a 4-hour marathon session yoga mala), take a new class (this was my rain plan for Saturday… and we ended up not getting any rain that day!), ride my bike over the weekend (uh… we opted for Sunday Lazy; except I did run before bed) and keep the burpees streak going (nope).

I’m really disappointed that I didn’t do my sun salutations because I really enjoyed the purpose and ritual that I got from doing them last year (also, OMG last year at this time I was in my marathon training!).

Anyway, I had to laugh at this: Why Summer Makes Us Lazy because HAAAAAAAAAA.

MONDAY: REST (dinner plans after work with boyfriend’s colleagues)

TUESDAY: I took my second golf lesson, which started off almost as terribly as the first. My instructor had to correct a few things with my swing and follow-through, and I was hitting a little better. But then she put a driver in my hand, and I just lost my focus to frustration.

WEDNESDAY: My weekly 15-minute run and hour of hot yoga combo at LifeTime. I didn’t really connect with the flow this week. Meh.

THURSDAY: REST

FRIDAY: The truth is, I wanted to work out in the morning because we had plans to go down to the Arts Festival after work, but… I just haven’t got to a point where I can function that early yet. REST (And some vodka lemonades. And a reminder to not schedule workouts yet for the morning because I won’t wake up.)

SATURDAY: I ran for 20 minutes, did 20 burpees, and then my Strong & Fast workout from Runner’s World that I typically do on Sundays. For this run, I did a little jaunt through Prague via my treadmill. I know that it’s been 10 years since I’ve been there IRL, but holy moly I don’t remember it being so hilly!

Later in the afternoon, we went to the driving range so I could practice what I learned in my lesson this week. Again, I am just overly frustrated and letting it get to me (but I did end with three really good shots with my driver, to end my practice!).

SUNDAY: I wasn’t going to let myself fail on ALL FIVE of my goals, so I ran 2 miles before bed to get my third run in for the week. I thought it would be best to take a day off from suspension training due to my chest tweak.

Goals for this week:

  • Keeping the consistency going: Run three times!
  • Take a new class (yes, recycling this one from last week). I’ll be at LifeTime for a massage on Saturday, so it just makes sense to take a class while I’m there.
  • Do you know that I’ve been running on my treadmill all this time? Well, this week, I’m taking one of my runs outside!
  • Adding to the above, I’m joining one of the local running groups for a social run!
  • Plan my vacation workouts! I’m going on a short road trip after the 4th, and I want to schedule my runs while I’m visiting two new cities: Know anyone that likes to run (or a run club) in Omaha or Kansas City?

Sunday Lately for this 30-Something:: Week 78

- Mel 7 Comments

Blogger Tribe_Sunday Lately Sunday, Sunday, SUNDAY! Sunday Lately is a weekly linkup hosted by the Blogger Tribe (lead by Angelica, Meghan, Nicole, and Katy). And the rest of us in the Blogger Tribe are sharing our posts today, too. The prompts for June 26 (Week 78):: Creating, Finding, Switching, Forgetting, Craving.

Catch up and read all of my past Sunday Lately posts and camp out with the Tribe on Facebook!

Creating:: an action plan (and riding map) for today’s bike-riding adventures (see: Forgetting).

Finding:: We had a pretty bad thunderstorm roll through last night (at around 2am). I got out of bed because it was so loud and so bright (and we were expected to get 50mph wind gusts), and and I could not find my 17-lb. cat. Like, anywhere. His storm spot is usually on the landings in between floors but he was nowhere (I even checked behind shower curtains in the bathtubs lol). I don’t know how cats can hide in plain sight sometimes.

Switching:: I went to the driving range yesterday to work on some of what I’ve learned in my lessons, and switching between clubs (specifically the 9 and 7 irons) really derailed and frustrated me. It took me a while to “fix” my driver stance and swing, too, but I ended up with three great shots (and then put my clubs away because let’s end on a high). I have my third lesson this week, so I can give her a little more feedback about how things go when I’m on my own. I feel as though my studies in applied psychology will be put to the test in this endeavor.

Forgetting:: Keep forgetting that my car is still downtown. I guess that’s one way to provoke a bike ride on a Sunday afternoon when you’d rather be lazy drinking grapefruit mimosas and wearing pajamas all day.

Craving:: BURGERS. We went out for dinner last week and sadly found Exile was closed on Monday nights. They are my favorite place to get burgers because they have gluten-free buns AND everything they fry is gluten-free friendly. Alas, we ended up at a place that cooks their burgers to a medium-well and just… NO THANK YOU. So, I’ve been craving burgers for a week, and we’re grilling out tonight. I don’t know why we didn’t just add burger night to our downtown adventures for today. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Accountability Week: Post-half marathon workouts

- Mel

Since I’m not currently training for anything (at least for a couple more weeks), and posting my workout weeks helps keep my motivation in check, this is my accountability week(s) post. I’m currently starting to look at training programs for running the full in October, with about 18-20 weeks of training, so I welcome any references! I’m familiar with Higdon’s model, but I’d like to know what else is out there. Update to my race schedule: I now have another half on the schedule in August (The Rock Hall half in Cleveland) and I’m running the Akron relay in September with some friends.

The week directly post-half marathon I DID NOTHING (in the form of exercise). It was kind of glorious, and it left me a good span of time to focus on finishing out my winter semester. My recovery from running the half was pretty seamless into my regular life; I was able to walk to work the next day (and the next!), with very little soreness. Must be that post-race chocolate milk!

My intention last week was to get a couple runs in to shake everything out, return to CrossFit workouts, and do some YOGA.

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Week May 11-17:

MONDAY: Rest Day, duh. While I generally don’t like working out on Mondays (I don’t know, I’m grumpy or something), my friend returned to spinning class on Monday evenings at the Y, so I’ll start that up again once a week starting next week.

TUESDAY: CrossFit. Naturally, we started off with a 500m run warm-up, and I was happy about all the mobility work. The WOD was a quickie 3RFT for stair climbs (3 stories), snatches, and box jumps. I stayed easy today, with only the bar, since I haven’t been going regularly.

WEDNESDAY: Run//yoga club at Urban Elements. We had a small group today, so we held a pretty quick pace (for me) of 9:30/mi for 4 miles. First run back, and it pushed me a bit, but I was able to keep up. And maybe I should stop running at 10:30/mi so much. Following up the run was a 75-minute yoga session, where we did a lot of Warrior work. It was intense! And we have a new instructor, but I loved how she taught for different skill levels. I’m hyper-mobile, so she also suggested some great adaptations for me to enhance my practice and how to stretch my hamstrings.

THURSDAY: Rest.

FRIDAY: Rest. Wine.

SATURDAY: Did another CrossFit session that was book-ended by running TO the box and then back home. In the rain, no less. We did a couple sprints before the WOD and a 500m run, then it was Elizabeth. I’m still hanging out in the Bronze category, so it was 55# for me and three miserable rounds of push-ups at 15-12-9. For time: 6:21 minutes.

SUNDAY: Another day of rest

Week May 18-24:

This was another week where I had a lot of motivation going into the week, yet quickly lost it because of stressing out about school work. I need to learn that taking a break to do something active will help alleviate that feeling, but I get SO blind-sided by the onslaught.

MONDAY: My return to spinning! This session reminded me why I love spinning so much — it’s such a great, low impact workout (I barely sweat, but that doesn’t mean I’m not trying) that hits you with that good soreness a day later.

TUESDAY: Rest day.

WEDNESDAY: Lunchtime yoga started today, courtesy of work. We get some wellness “points” that contribute to a program that gives us some money back for our health premiums by participating. Plus, I get away from my desk for an hour a week. This session was a great restorative and slow practice, and she actually went well over an hour (oops). I enjoyed every minute of it.

After work, I had a hair appointment near home, which I planned to run to. I took a long route through the Point, which was a nice 1.90 miles to add to the log this week.

THURSDAY: STRESS DAY. Because let’s be honest, while I wasn’t necessarily working out, my body and mind were not at rest. BLARGH.

FRIDAY: This was a rest day.

SATURDAY: Does cleaning my patio count? Because I feel like it was a workout.

SUNDAY: My return to golfing! Oh man, I am still terrible, but I had one really great drive out of 9 holes of play. Now, how can I do that all the time?

It was absolutely wonderful to be out in the sun, and as I mentioned before, my boyfriend is super relaxed when playing so I really had fun despite my annoyances of not being able to get much lift on the ball. It felt like vacation in a way; we had lunch outside at the club and then hung out at the pool for a couple hours.

How is everyone else doing in their “off season”? Have you planned your next races?

SUNDAY LATELY: Planning, Loving, Reading, Wishing, Feeling

- Mel

I’m joining in today’s Sunday Lately as part Blogger, May I? month of prompts.

Planning:
Oh, I’m planning to be outdoors for most of today and tomorrow. The weather here in Pittsburgh has been downright beautiful, and what a way to start the summer season. See also: POOL TIME!

Loving:
We spent a good bit of time out in our courtyard yesterday cleaning. I also had a gift card to spend at HomeGoods, so I picked up a few decor items for outside — candles, lanterns, some new seat cushions for our bistro chairs. Sadly, could not find the right size, right color free-standing umbrella. I even spray-painted an old IKEA iron table that’s been hanging out in our basement for a couple years. I absolutely adore our courtyard and love that we can have this type of outdoor space while living in the city.

A photo posted by Melinda (@melliesmel) on

Reading:
I’ve loaded up a few books to my iPad’s Kindle app to enjoy poolside today. I’m only 4 books behind pace to finish 52 books this year, so I plan to catch up by at least 1. By tomorrow, I’d really like to be up to only 2 behind. I know that I’ll be able to catch up completely once my semester is over in August. Anyways, lazy days of reading really make me feel happy.

Wishing:
I haven’t golfed in a couple years, so I’m wishing for a moderately-painless game today (I’m pretty bad). I never devoted enough time to get my golf game up to par (HAR!), but since the boyfriend started going more regularly I’ll be out a lot more this summer practicing. He’s the complete opposite golfer than me and so relaxed, where I am incredibly frustrated. Hoping some of that will rub off on me.

Feeling:
So, this is a bit embarrassing to admit, but we recently joined a country club and my first time visiting is today. I’m feeling really anxious about “fitting in” and making sure I “follow” appropriately all the social cues of being a member. Again, I realize how ridiculous this sounds, but I am terribly awkward at these sorts of social functions and at making small talk and feel a little out of my element. I’m trying to focus on that pool and pretending that I’m on vacation.