one word

The One Word Project: This post is INTENTIONAL

- Mel

Continuing on the theme of goals this week… This word was self-selected through a series of goal-setting exercises in March. This theme of intent kept coming up like a random word generator lottery winner.

intentional one word project

Definition of intention, per Merriam-Webster:

1 : a determination to act in a certain way : RESOLVE
2 : IMPORT, SIGNIFICANCE
3a : what one intends to do or bring about
b : the object for which a prayer, mass, or pious act is offered
4 : a process or manner of healing of incised wounds
5 : CONCEPT
especially : a concept considered as the product of attention directed to an object of knowledge
6 intentions plural : purpose with respect to marriage

“The process or manner of healing of incised wounds.” OUCH. PSA: Do not google the differences between lacerations and incised wounds.

The thesaurus tells me that I am calculated, willful, and deliberate. I am nothing if not determined, despite my weaknesses and wounds (using as a metaphor for emotional scarring seems apropos here despite MW wanting to grammar correct me). I am intentional – even if I DO NOT PULL IT OFF (emphasis stolen from Vocabulary.com). I am excited by challenge, to achieve something new, change for the sake of change, and ultimately determined to see things through. I am not always a success. That’s OK. I think I’ve lost sight of this in the last few months, distracted by my safety behaviors of escaping and avoidance to prevent me from judgment of others – and worse, rejection from them.

So, what is my overall intention? To stick with something, ask for help when I need it, and see through the difficulties to finish what I started. Yes, I’m looking at you, grad school.

What is the One Word Project? I asked some people in my life to describe me/sum me up in one word to explore areas of strengths and for personal/professional development. I plan to make this part of a regular (and evolving) series and will continue to ask those around me to participate. Read other One Word posts.

Goals for April – and March Updates

- Mel

BIG FEAR has been a theme around which much of my goal work has focused. What am I afraid of? has been a constant in considering some of the reasons why I either a) don’t end up doing something or b) freaking out needlessly. I have neither the mission of letting others down or creating undue stress for myself. So, I persist in exploring why fear continues to come up for me.

Let’s recap first for March:

1. Find one day every other week – at least 2 hours – where I am working outside of my home. This did not happen this month; however, I DID leave the house quite a bit this month – just not with the intention of work.
2. Connect with a friend – old or new – each and every week. DONE. This small act has made me so happy this month!
3. Do 3 things out of my comfort zone this month. I didn’t necessarily keep track of the quantity but I kept the ultimate goal of getting out of my comfort zone as a recurring theme of the month. So much so, that I submitted an application to do a workshop at a youth camp and OMG I HAVE TO ACTUALLY FOLLOW THROUGH THIS MONTH.
4. Visit one new local establishment, restaurant, shop, museum. Yes! My husband and I went to THREE new (to me) restaurants this month (801 Chophouse, Splash, and Aposto), and I met with friends at four new places (Gong Fu Tea, The Hall, The Wine Experience, and Z Mariks). I really took advantage of Spring Break. In April, I would like to do more than restaurant or drinking establishments.
5. Start a reflection journal for school. Ugh, I still haven’t started this. It’s now spring semester and will I ever? I need to explore more why I initially set this intention and haven’t been able to follow through. More to come on that reflection.
6. Publish a new One Word Project post. Yes! Read my latest post.

As I previously mentioned, spring quarter is in full swing. I am taking five classes – including starting my coursework for my corresponding Entrepreneurship Certificate. I’m excited about all my classes right now and I am also realistic that this workload doesn’t offer much “free” time to focus on other areas. And also, see #3 above where I have to create and implement a youth workshop. *gulp*

In any event, here is what I put together for April:

1. I am already doing a daily meditation – in fact, I am currently on a 54-day streak! That said, many of those times have been a OMG I’M IN BED AND I FORGOT TO DO MY MEDITATION. So I play the guided sleep meditation. Meditation is meditation (and this session in particular, while only a few minutes helps me sleep like a freaking baby)… BUT. I want to make it more of an intentional practice rather than another “thing to do” on my bedtime task list. So my goal is to at least 3x per week to do my meditation in the morning or afternoon for at least 10 minutes.

2. I want to visit the Des Moines Art Center, or a different gallery or see a new exhibition at least once this month.

3. Create and execute a (somewhat flawless) one-hour workshop!

4. I started making a Des Moines coffee shop list. There are SO MANY that I haven’t yet been. I’m already driving into downtown twice a week for physical therapy, so at least once a week, I’m going to hit one of those on my list.

5. Get my bike into Rasmussen for a season tune-up. I have a Women on Adventures event planned for the end of April, for which I’ll need my bike!

This sounds like a good place to start! What’s on your goal list for April?

The One Word Project: Sister #1

- Mel

I individually asked my three sisters to send me one word that describes me best. Two immediately responded, the third responded a few days later. One questioned whether her hyphenated word fit the parameter of one word. Another texted me THREE words – which I made her choose one. JUST ONE. GAWD.

I love my sisters, and their responses typify their personalities and made me feel proud in a unique way on how they viewed me. Their selection provoked me to consider my relationship in context of their chosen word, too. I am trying to reflect on the word as seen through their lens. For this post, I’m starting with my Second-in-Command – the sister just below me in the “I was born first” hierarchy.

Her word is: Impossible. Just kidding, it was AMBITIOUS.

Sister 1 Text - Ambitious One word Project

I would be remiss in not posting her initial reply: Passionate… ??? Cultured… ambitious… [JUST ONE!]. She responds Impossible!!! It’s perfect. (She genuinely responds Ambitious in a later text; however, this was a fun experiment.)

She is the first in our family to get a graduate degree, and here she is calling me ambitious. The nerve.

When image searching “ambitious” this picture was in the results and I cannot stop laughing:


The first bite is always the hardest, kid.

The definition of ambitious is the belief in oneself that they will achieve what they desire and determination to satisfy high aspirations. Yeah, that is certainly me!

The thesaurus tells me that I am also aggressive, determined, earnest, energetic, enthusiastic, and resourceful. All of these I would argue define how my ambition bolsters my will to succeed. Sure, I get lazy and bore quickly, but this is where looking towards my next challenge reignites my goal focus. And yes, my sister was also spot-in in saying “impossible.” I have a tendency to be too self-focused, single-minded, and stubborn, and is the source of much of the reflection and personal development that I’ve been working on this year.

Related: I love this idea of writing an Ambition Letter related to high goals (despite only anecdotal evidence). The first rule of goal-setting is writing it down! {via Fast Company}

Extra reading: Why ambitious goals may help {via Headspace}

What is the One Word Project? I asked some people in my life to describe me/sum me up in one word to explore areas of strengths and for personal/professional development. I plan to make this part of a regular (and evolving) series and will continue to ask those around me to participate.

Post note: What I love right now about this exercise, is that when someone responds, I simply tell them “thank you.” And I haven’t yet had anyone ask me why. No one has asked me to give them a word in return. This is a really fun experiment!

Goals for March

- Mel

I didn’t get much into resolutions for 2018, being that I am V.FOCUSED on grad school. Though as the first few months of the year have unfolded and I find myself into new rhythms of my personal and professional life, I needed to be more intentional about a few things.

I set a book goal at the beginning of the year, challenging myself to read two books per month, and I’m actually one book ahead right now! I started a daily meditation practice a few weeks ago, too, and I am already recognizing the benefit of it – but also seeing the difficulty of attempting to do something every.single.day. Especially for 10 minutes! That sounds so silly that I cannot sit still for ten whole minutes, but there are some days where it is exceptionally painful (not physically).

I am a work in progress!

That said, the nightly sleep meditations put my ass RIGHT down that I can barely countdown to 997 before I realize that I’m awakening and it’s morning.

Trying something new… badly.

Here’s what I got for March:

1. I haven’t done this yet, but I plan to find one day every other week – at least 2 hours – where I am working outside of my home. I miss Coffee Shop Life, and I have yet to explore some of the awesome local establishments since moving to Des Moines. This also fulfills two areas of interest for me. Note to self: remember to bring your charge cords next time?

2. Connect with a friend – old or new – each and every week. Real conversations on the phone and in-person have done beautiful things for my happiness. I am answering the phone (GASP!). I am returning calls. I am being intentional about meeting up with friends – and connecting with people I’ve met here locally and haven’t been good about regularly keeping in touch.

3. Do 3 things out of my comfort zone this month. This is a good number that is realistic but challenging, and also considers my energy levels and weeks where my school workload ebb-and-flows.

4. Visit one new local establishment, restaurant, shop, museum. Again, this kind of piggy-backs on my first goal, but I have a list of places that I want to visit and it’s time to start exploring.

5. Start a reflection journal for school. This was a goal that I set for myself at the beginning of the quarter in January, and I STILL haven’t started it. Geesh.

I guess if I would have to pick a word for the year, it would be “intentional.” Maybe I should add that to my One Word Project! I’d also like to get another one of those posts up this month. So I guess that I have 6 goals this month!

hello and high five greeting cards des moines

TOOT TOOT!

This month celebrates women, with this past Thursday celebrating International Women’s Day. Come over to Hello & High Five to read an interview with me – one of their featured “She-roes” – where I share my own motivations and goals, how I made friends after moving to Des Moines, who my own women heroes are, and how I “do it all” (spoiler alert: I can’t!).

The One Word Project: FIERY

- Mel

One of my best friends – I’ll call her E – and I met when we both were transplanted to Pittsburgh and very probably originally connected online via Twitter. She brings youth to my “old lady” perspective and in a lot of ways we couldn’t be more different. And that is exactly why, I believe, that we connected so strongly and why – even after both relocating to new cities – we are still friends today.

Her response when I requested my word via text was: Fiery.

Now, when requesting my word, I didn’t prompt for reasons or provoke with any follow-up questions, I just sat with the word and reflected on why this important person in my life would describe me as such. I LOVE THIS WORD. And I feel it is a clear descriptor of my tenacity to keep moving, to question everything, and do such with passion. I really, really hope it’s not because of my Irish temper or my hair reverting back to a childhood tint of red, which I spend hundreds of dollars per year trying to reject… my Irish roots, I mean, my hair.

What?!

I consulted the thesaurus to give more dimension to my word: combustible (last I checked, I was not literally on fire; though I like to figuratively burn things down), passionate (yep, me!), excitable (very much), and intense (not emotionally intense, but strong in my opinions and often too serious). E and I also ended up working together in Pittsburgh, and had the extreme joy at being able to plan her wedding shower. She was around when I was fired up to go back to school in my 30s to finish my undergrad and my seemingly-endless efforts to find a marketing & communications job (which took me THREE YEARS). She knows how intensely passionate I get about personal causes and principles. She has also probably been exhausted by my excitability. 🙂

How I plan to use this word in the future: I think sometimes we all can lose sight of why we do something – or why we started something. Reflecting on what fires me up – or makes me fiery – will help tie my projects and goals back to my passions and purpose. I need to keep perspective on what originally got me excited to pursue something in the first place and be OK changing my goals if my fire burns out. Also, maybe, not burn things down so much?

fiery sriracha one word project

BE LIKE THE SRIRACHA KETCHUP.

What is the One Word Project? I asked some people in my life to describe me/sum me up in one word to explore areas of strengths and for personal/professional development. I plan to make this part of a regular (and evolving) series and will continue to ask those around me to participate.