30 things

2014 Resolutions & Intentions

- Mel

IN WITH THE NEW

The big BUT: take the word “but” out of the conversation; replace with “and” when necessary. Work on everyday conversational language skills.

Procrastination, full stop: I need to get my shit together. And I need to stop overdrawing my checking account. I mean, I HAVE the money in my other account, and I just have to transfer it over, but… well, I’ve just felt like an irresponsible mess. It’s bad enough that I’m making nowhere near the salary that I did five years ago… ugh, just GET IT TOGETHER.

30-something problems: My self confidence has taken a nose dive this year on account of aging (and its associated havoc wrecked on my face) and not being able to find a job. Both have seriously made me feel worthless — as a woman and as a partner. I’M TRYING SO HARD, and I basically feel like a failure at life. The job market is tough right now — especially for someone at my age without a completed bachelors degree. School was obviously the next step, and I’m enrolled, and I have a plan, and graduation is within a two-year reach. So… breathe? I’m also meeting with a friend in a couple weeks who works with dermatologists to discuss some options (she seemingly knows everything about skincare and she’s a fantastic make-up artist) AND was referred a new dermatologist office (one that has all the new technology for face fixin’). It’s not like I don’t have plans, but lack of full-time income really does hold me back.

Let’s get cooking: Stop making excuses in the kitchen. Oh, I have many: I don’t know how, everything I make tastes like crap, I have no time, bones are gross, I hate doing dishes (I really just hate messes in general — even when the boyfriend is cooking)… I just don’t want to cook. Welp, this is going nowhere fast, see? Then I read about Feast from Summer Tomato. The 30-day “cooking bootcamp” with Feast includes online classes that teach the fundamentals and how to enjoy being in the kitchen. Yes, this will be one of my 30-day Challenges for 2014!

Me Time: Get more massages. Seriously. I need to start taking care of ME. My body is just miserable with knots and sore muscles — it truly is much needed therapy when you play a sport like I do.

In pants we trust: Find a pair of pants that fit. Last fall I had a complete breakdown in my closet, and subsequently had to rid it of at least 15 pairs of bottoms. As my glutes and hams continue to grow (I’m not mad!), I’m now busting out of the pants that remained. I have a problem with tights too, so generally dresses are out, at least for this time of year. The last 5 skirts I purchased needed serious tailoring to fit my shape (short, muscular people problems?). Regardless, I’m just a pants person. So help me, I’ll find a tailor and have pants made for me, if I have to!

What goals or resolutions are you setting for yourself this year?

30-day Challenges: on hiatus, but back for the new year

- Mel

It’s not too early to think about resolutions.

Yeah, life is not full of guarantees.
Yeah, life is not full of guarantees – money-back or otherwise.

To say the last year has been difficult is an understatement. As you know, I lost my grandfather in March, was told I had skin cancer in April (subsequent surgery in May), and then my grandmother passed in July. After grieving and vacationing and catching back up on life, I feel like I’ve spent the better part of the last six months… well, not feeling “better.” On the upside, I’m starting to feel like myself again. And feeling like I can handle a few 30-day challenges in the new year that were long-forgotten in 2013.

Promises Made, Promises Broken.

I started off the year with 30 days of NO ALCOHOL – my second year meeting the challenge; third-year attempt (I made it 28 days the first year). February was a lesson in waking up early; March, well, that’s when everything started to fail with my addiction to sweets. My 30-day yoga challenge for May was not possible because of my two-week healing (and no exercise) from MOHs surgery. For what it’s worth, I did NOT spend any money in June — that month’s intended challenge. (yay?) And I accepted a workout challenge in September (to replace giving up social media because… no) to start a fundamentals CrossFit program (not exercising every DAY, mind you, but starting the program AND going to all classes at 6am). Help.

A Year of Promises – 2013
January: 30 days of no alcohol.
February: 30 days of WAKING UP BEFORE 8am.
March: 30 days of no sweets
April: 30 days of “something new”
May: 30 days of yoga
June: 30 days spending freeze
July: 30 days of NO PANTS (dresses and skirts only; save for working out)
August: 30 days of volunteering
September: 30 days without social media
October: 30 days of dates!
November: 30 days of blog posts
December: 30 days of relaxing

Once you get off the ride, it’s hard to get back on.

Anyways, my 30-day challenges took a back seat to life, and I’m ready to go again January 1 with my annual no-alcohol challenge. But I’m also considering coordinating with a total Paleo month as well (I mean, since there’s no alcohol allowed anyway). But oh, THE CHEESE. I don’t know if I’ll keep the same list, but I’ll spend the next month figuring out how to plan the next year.

December, relaxing? Pssh.

What 30-day challenge ideas do you have — or do you complete — as part of your New Year’s goals or resolutions?

Image credit: from Stuart Miles via FreeDigitalPhotos.

May & June 30 Challenge: Promises Made, Promises Broken

- Mel

Because of my surgery and mandatory activity break last month, I couldn’t complete my 30 days of yoga challenge for May. I will likely revisit this later in the calendar (perhaps at the end of my derby season). The 30-day promise for 2013 moves on, as I am currently on a spending freeze for June.

I’m glad that I noticed it was June before I did any shopping therapy this weekend. Because… ALL OF THE THINGS ON SALE.

frozen credit card

This is a big month for my budget… and by “big” I mean this month will be HARD to budget. I’m still paying off doctor bills (estimate there’s another $300 left to pay; all these bills keep coming from various billing offices. ANNOYING.) It’s my last month of car payments (woohoo!)… but my car’s 95,000 mile maintenance is scheduled for the weekend. Also, new tires and front brakes are in the works (we have a $2,000 cap for car work before we just push that towards a down payment on a newer model. I’d like to have no car payments for a year, but that might be lofty plans.) Passport renewal cost me $200 because of expedited fees. Paying off an old debt to a former college so I can obtain my transcripts for Fall registration (what a mess) is over $1,000 (baby steps).

This kind of challenge is difficult for summer. But it’s all June, with none of the frivolous spending around here. I’m talking freezing the monies on: shorts, shoes, happy hours, all the little house things that I do not need right this minute, nail polish and snack box subscriptions, nip toys for the cats, trinkets from the gift shop at work, amazon books (*gulp*)… derby schwag (eeek). No charges on my credit cards. FROZEN. I need to dip into savings and joint account to even make this month work financially — and our joint account is already taking a beating from home repairs, renovations, decorating and an upcoming (kinda unplanned) vacation. Picking up a new freelance client was definitely a highlight (and much needed) this month.

And if I *do* find myself with a shopping itch, I have a $60 Target gift card from my birthday with which to scratch it. 😉

Read more about my year-long 30-day challenges.
Jan: no alcohol
Feb: wake up early
March: no sweets
April: something new (post coming!)

March 30: a lesson in emotional eating

- Mel

No sweets. NO SWEETS FOR 30 DAYS. I knew this would be a difficult month, but really didn’t anticipate HOW HARD keeping desserts away from my pie hole would be. It was a long, cold month.

Within the first week of giving up sweets, I had a four-day headache.

Then I had a tooth pulled and continuously craved ice cream during the healing process.

St. Patrick’s Day and my anniversary happened… this was my first “cheat” day: an all-you-can-eat breakfast buffet, which, naturally, included a dessert table, a bananas foster table AND a make-your-own ice cream table. The ice cream felt so wonderful on my gums that I almost tossed the entire month-long challenge in the garbage right then-and-there.

I was determined to finish strong, however; intsead using my “free” day at the end of the month (originally planned for Easter) to make up for the one-day lapse.

Each day for the last week of the month, the breakroom at my part-time job was filled with cookies and doughnuts and candy.

Then I had a death in the family and was surrounded by sugary gifts from friends and neighbors. Sigh.

Basically, after giving up sweets for 16 days straight, on the 17th day I fell to my sugar cravings because of a flaw in the emotional eating segment of my psyche. I pressed restart for another few days, then succumbed again. I didn’t just stumble, I GONE TRIPPED AND BROKE MY WILLPOWER. All of it.

And then on the 31st day, at the sight of my first period in several months, I celebrated my failure with a crushed Samoas cookie vanilla sundae. Because that’s what 30-something females do: we eat away our PMS and feelings.

What you missed:
Read more about my 30-day challenges for 2013.
January: no alcohol!
February: it’s wake-up time!

February 30: a lesson in getting out of bed

- Mel

I am NOT a morning person.

I am also an insomniac. In an attempt to regulate my sleeping schedule and embrace the creativity that comes with early-morning writing and generally be super cranky for 30 days, this month’s Wake Up Every Morning Before 8am had disappointing results. Meaning: I actually slept less and not more. I’d be worn out from a long day, and still be up until 1am or later (even when retiring to bed by 11pm) and still have to wake up by 8am. Not to mention, this last week we had painters come EVERY morning by 7am. SEVEN. I was exhausted and cranky and unmotivated and uncreative and felt lethargic for most of February. I know how important sleep is, and I’ve tried every trick in the book (there’s no TV in our bedroom; I read before bedtime; I drink tea) and I’ve tried several different drugs. (let me tell you about the time I took 2 Simply Sleep pills before an international flight from Germany and was WIDE AWAKE the entire trip. FML.) On top of all that, I have TWO separate sleeping problems (well, three if you count the asshole cat that wakes me up at 3:30): going to sleep and staying asleep. It’s one, the other or both on most nights… that I usually make up for by way of afternoon naps on my days off and a night or two a month of dead sleep for 10-12 hours (from pure exhaustion, I’m sure).

The only time I felt rested this month was in California — which, shocker, is closer to my regular sleep patterns considering Pacific Time (I was asleep by 11pm every night and up by 8am — and OUT THE DOOR with really shitty hotel coffee, doing things, by 9am). And if you’re thinking “it’s vacation, of course you slept better.” Not so fast… I had derby responsibilities nearly EVERY day on our trip, so it’s not like it was a no-schedule-free-for-all. Plus, there was a lot of drive time and no sleep in the car (since I was mostly an anxious passenger).

I have to accept that I just might not be on the same schedule as the “average” 30-something. Those two extra hours of sleep are imperative to my well-being. So this 30-day challenge* was a lesson in listening to MY body; not what society thinks is the “right time to be up-and-at-’em.” Also: ear plugs are a MUST. This is a new discovery, thanks to an awesome care package I received.

Do you have your own sleep challenges? Let’s talk about it in the comments!

*I used two days from the end of January to make up for the short month. And to be completely transparent, I missed two days — one, the day after vacation, I woke up at 10am; two, the morning after a couple margaritas, I woke up at 9am. I gave it the ol’ college try!

Next up: NO SUGAR FOR 30 DAYS IN MARCH. *gulp*

Read more:
My year of 30-day challenges.
January Success: No Alcohol for 30 days!

Weekly Therapy: stop picking on me!

- Mel

the week:
Five days straight of roller derby. Whew. I’m exhausted.

Oh, and my nose is severely bruised (hopefully not broken, but ouch). Not dealing with that until I’m home from California. I also found myself in tears again in the middle of practice out of total anger and frustration after a drill. Then the next practice I smashed my knee on the rink floor (yes, even with knee pads). W.T.F. This week is picking on me.

weekend:
Day trip to Philly for banked track training camp. We’re playing two banked track games in San Diego (we are part of WFTDA, a flat track league), so we need to LEARN how to skate that type of track beforehand. This is on my derby bucket list, so I am excite.

Then, napping all of the hours on Sunday. What super bowl? Pffft. Oh, I probably should get some packing done for Cali. (I’m going to try to fit in meeting an out-of-town, visiting-someone-else friend for brunch too.)

This weekend is also GROUNDHOG DAY. Man, one year I have to drive up to Punxsutawney to experience that madness. Also, I spelled that correctly on my first try! If you can’t make it to see Phil in person, Groundhog Day (the amazing movie starring Bill Murray) is playing tonight at the Hollywood theater in Dormont.

52 books in 52 weeks:
9. The Widow Clicquot by Tilar J. Mazzeo. 304 pages. LONG pages. Woof. I never thought I’d finish this book. I was anticipating reading it for weeks (while it was checked out of my branch for a month or so by someone else); what a let-down.

seven things, seven days:
1. Started my 30 days of waking up before 8am… *yawn*
2. Also, my first drink of alcohol in 31 days. Hello, beer.
3. Check out this awesome article from Pitt News about my derby league (you just might spot me in the gallery too *wink*).
4. HOMEMADE YOGURT-COVERED CRANBERRIES!!! {from the Kitchn}
5. Interviewing for a local non-profit internship position for a really cool project. Wish me luck!
6. Boredom (and me) explained! (in under 300 words) {from PsyBlog}
7. How to cope with failure {from PsychCentral}

Tell me what’s part of your Weekend Therapy!

January Success: 30 days of no alcohol for this 30-something!

- Mel

I cannot wait to kick back and drink a beer with my teammates after practice Thursday — my 30 days without alcohol challenge is complete (yes, that 31st day is a “freebie”). And I earned it!

On tap since 12/28/12: still haven’t been able to drink it.

This month has been nothing short of stressful: tryouts for derby and adjusting to subsequent practice schedule, medical issues and weird doctor appointments, planning and executing a friend’s bridal shower… I can’t tell you how many times I wanted a drink. And, considering that we never drank our bottle of champagne on New Year’s Eve (we didn’t drink at ALL, so technically speaking, I’ve already accomplished 30 days off the sauce), I’ve had to look at that tasty bottle of Rose for THIRTY DAYS. Down the hatch for brunch on Sunday.

The challenge was to get my head in the right place for the beginning of my season. I also need to find alternative ways to deal with my stress. If I had drowned my feelings in vodka then I likely would have been hungover or generally feeling pretty crappy and unmotivated to do HALF of these things. But I’ve had a clear mind and my body feels pretty good. It wasn’t life changing, but it was definitely a test.

More about my 30-days-for-2013 resolutions challenge.
Up next: waking up before 8 am every day in February. Yeah, it’s not 30 days, but we do what we can with the short month (I’m drawing in the 31st from January to make it at least 29)! This is going to be harder than not drinking.

30 Random Things (about me)

- Mel
An honest depiction of “Life in Your 30s” to which we can all relate.

1. I am 35.
2. I live with my boyfriend. We’ve been together for 3.5 years.
3. I live in Pittsburgh.
4. I’m from Ohio.
5. I’ve been blogging (elsewhere) since 2002!
6. I have three cats.
7. I could eat cheese-and-onion enchiladas every day.
8. I do eat a sandwich every day.
9. I’m an “accidental entrepreneur” and own my own Web copywriting company.
10. I also work part-time at a zoo.
11. AND I volunteer at our local humane society shelter.
12. I play roller derby.
13. I’ve always hated my hair.
14. I can never be barefoot — even in my house.
15. The beach is the worst (see above, but also because I hate the heat & I’m not supposed to get any sun exposure).
16. Fall is my favorite season!
17. My personal style statement includes a lot of layering.
18. I love accessorizing. My favorite part of fashion!
19. I struggle with age. A lot of that has to do with how my face has changed in the last few years.
20. But mostly because my “five-year plan” includes the number 40.
21. I deal with #19 by regular facials. It’s made a HUGE difference! (and it’s kind of a nice spoil)
22. My favorite make-up line is LORAC.
23. I cannot leave the house without mascara. Ever.
24. My favorite place in the world is Prague, Czech Republic.
25. My first passport expires next year, and that makes me sad (plus, my photo is a perfect memory).
26. Camping is my favorite outdoor activity (followed by kayaking, at a close second).
27. I quit smoking 4 years ago (08-08 is my anniversary). I’ve never been prouder of an accomplishment.
28. The boyfriend & I have a community garden plot in the city; this season has surely been a lesson in amateur gardening!
29. We are a one-car household.
30. I’m so happy to FINALLY have a new space for a new blog! (WELCOME!)

Phew. 🙂